Time is very strange at the moment. In some ways it feels like it is moving very slowly, but also I blink and another day has gone by. Making the decision to take a break from professional life was relatively easy. I simply do not have the energy to provide the service my clients deserve. I will be honest and admit that I do not have a return date planned. I will know when the time is right.
I could describe myself as housebound, as I cannot drive, hubby is too busy to take me anywhere (and I have not felt well enough to go out anyway) and we live miles from the nearest bus route. However, I am outside at least 3 times per day - sorting out the animals and walking Buzz the dog - so I know I am lucky. Things could be a lot worse.
I am on Day 9 of withdrawal from codeine. I am tentatively saying that the worst of the symptoms have passed. I have managed to sit at my computer for a couple of hours this morning (sorting through emails, unsubscribing from newsletters and cancelling any regular payments that are not totally essential), and now back on again as the rain storm rapidly approaches Pembrokeshire. Taking a break from doing readings is enabling me to take the time I need to properly rest and eventually to spend more time doing things that make my heart sing (crafting, gardening ...). However, my income is reduced and there is very little spare money once the regular bills are paid. I could really do with winning the Lottery!
One of the reasons why I am back at my computer is that the daytime tv on a Saturday is rubbish! I really got into the routine of watching the programmes during the week. That is something I have not done for years. For the first couple of days I felt the usual guilt for not being busy, but soon realised that rest is essential. I now put my feet up whenever the essential chores are done, which brings me onto the second part of this post title.
Cobwebs - we have had some sunny days this week and this really highlights the result of my lack of energy and sickness etc. Cobwebs are everywhere. I managed to remove them from our dining room yesterday ready for a meeting - but the rest of the house will have to wait for a day when I can walk around with the big fluffy duster. I love housework and home management, and always kept up with the cleaning by doing the essentials each day and then at least one extra task. We have a big house and really I need to be spending several hours per day to keep it at the level I want. For the past couple of weeks I have been doing very little and the dust/cobwebs etc are building up. This is a side effect of chronic illness that most people wouldn't think about.
Life changes so much when a chronic illness hits you like a sledge hammer. My world has literally shrunk. I used to love travelling, but now I really prefer to stay at home (car travel is painful, I get nausea and coping with the movement/noise/lights etc is difficult). I am hopeful that I can reduce my symptoms and get stronger. Coming off the codeine tablets is the first step in a long journey.
I hope to blog tomorrow about the latest journal I am making. Visit me again soon if you are interested in mixed media/book making.
ETA - I find crafting and also learning new skills to be a fantastic way of distracting me from pain. I have joined Life Book 2017 - a year long mixed media class starting on 1st January. Click on the link to read more about it and register. It would be great to see lots of Spoonies there.